Friday, July 21, 2006

Heroines I Want to Clobber

Pamela Morsi is one of those authors who I've heard much about but whom I've never had the opportunity to read because other books have always gotten in the way. Added to that the fact that she writes stories set in the West or Frontierland (isn't that a part of Disneyland?) and you have me moving her books further and further down my TBR pile. However, recently I decided to give her a go. I own both COURTING MISS HATTIE and SWEETWOOD BRIDE. I read the latter. Now, the book is a good one and I would recommend it. HOWEVER, watch out for the heroine, a real piece of work. Let me just say that I wanted the hero to find her beaten in a ditch. I don't condone violence against women, but this bitch (YES, SHE WAS A BITCH) really ticked me off. She did everything another book's villain would do; she lied, trapped the hero into marriage, destroyed the hero's chances at a future and yet...for a while had absolutely no remorse. What the fuck!?! I didn't get why she was the heroine. We see these twits populating soap operas and other romance novels all the time and they ALWAYS ALWAYS get their comeuppance. Here, this chick didn't get any of that...far from it. She got her man and lived happily ever after. Did I miss something?

The story goes a little like this - heroine meets hero one day near a stream; he is immediately attracted. She likes his looks and hears that he is a fine man. They kiss briefly. Next thing the hero knows, he's being tracked down by men demanding that he marry the heroine because the heroine has pretty much accused the hero of taking advantage of her and getting her knocked up. So the hero's like NO WAY and the men are like OH, YEAH and the heroine is like NOW YOU'VE GOT TO MARRY ME SUCKA and the story begins.

The heroine wants to see her orphaned siblings together as one whole family...a bit hard if she's not married. No one would allow it. She believes marrying is the key towards the realization of her dream. She believes she's doing the hero a favor by marrying him...I don't know why this chick thinks this...she's definitely living in lala land most of the time. The hero is furious. Hates the heroine's guts and starts seeing her as less attractive than she actually is (she's gorgeous, of course). He even mentions that she's so so looking and has stringy hair. This part is actually pretty funny; he thinks such nasty things about her. He has always dreamt of leaving the small town of Sweetwood for Texas and this ruins everything. Ultimately, they live happily ever after and the heroine becomes a lot more likeable, but one can never forget exactly how coldly she lied and destroyed the hero's dreams. The book was good, with quite a few amusing scenes. Also, had some great potential for sequels, but I can't seem to find any. I'd give the book a C. It kept me entertained but it left me with a bittersweet taste in my mouth. I just can't give a book whose heroine I detested a higher grade. The book was incredible but the heroine just left me so angry....a fictional character pissing me off...argh!

Along the lines of HEROINES I WANT TO CLOBBER is the heroine of Deborah Simmons' THE LAST ROGUE, a woman who is a rude bitch to the hero for about 150 pages. It's frustrating to say the least. The heroine and hero find themselves in the same bed by accident. You know the routine...they're discovered and are forced to get married. The heroine is the plain sister of a gorgeous woman and is just plain hateful all the time. She's a miserable creature and resents the fact that she is forced to marry what she believes is a lying charmer. The girl is an idiot. She is rude to the hero ALL THE TIME. The guy can't even smile or crack a joke; lethal barbs are her weapon of choice and she says some pretty hurtful things to the hero. The hero is a charmer and has helped several of his friends marry. He doesn't understand why the heroine doesn't like him. Well, the story gets better. It's obvious she has pretty low self-esteem and he helps her realize how beautiful she actually is. Of course, there's some sort of ghostly intrigue that brings them together, but the story is well written. I was just disappointed with the heroine's antics because she misunderstood everything the hero said and thought ill of him to such an extent that I couldn't stomach her and almost threw the book into the trash. I'm glad I didn't mostly because of the hero. Would I recommend the book? Yes. What grade would I give it? Despite the heroine, I'd give it a solid B. Had the heroine been a little more cheerful, the book would have gotten an A-. The heroine wasn't as selfish as Morsi's heroine, so I can stand to give the book a higher grade.

Encountered any other infuriating heroines? I know the lovely ladies of SANCTUARY'S FINEST do all the time.


Amarjaa said...

So the hero's like NO WAY and the men are like OH, YEAH and the heroine is like NOW YOU'VE GOT TO MARRY ME SUCKA and the story begins.

Ew. I'm at a loss to think how anyone would think this a romantic story!

Wendy said...

I still have Sweetwood buried around here somewhere but take it from me - COURTING MISS HATTIE is fantastic!!! And I give you my gaurantee that the heroine is a not a bitch.

romancelover said...

Amarjaa - I thought the same thing the first time I picked up the book but I kept on hearing about Morsi and how great her stories were. All About Romance's reviewer hated the heroine also. It's really too bad because the story would have been AMAZING had the heroine showed remorse...I mean she was sorta kinda sorry at one pt but it wasn't enough for me. I would recommend it because the writing is so good and the hero...well, he just captured my heart. I'm at a loss but I can't honestly say that the book was terrible because it wasn't. The heroine...argh...maybe I'll get over it eventually.

Wendy - I keep on hearing that the Miss Hattie book is incredible...hmmm...I have to read it. I've had it too long!!!

sybil said...

read courting, sweetwood I didn't finish cuz well you pretty much said why ;)

alex f said...

I've read two recently that had stupid and/or hateful heroines. Stranger in My Arms by Lisa Kleypas-Lara is a complete drip. I wanted to smack her. She alternated between flinching every time her husband came near (like she expected him to attack her) and trying to get him to kiss her some more. She did other irritating stuff throughout the book. The second was In a Prince's Bed by Sabrina Jeffries. The heroine spends the whole book mistrustful of the hero (thinking him a rake), making disparraging remarks about him, to his face, and continually comparing him unfavorably to her previous suitor whom she throws over for the hero. I just wanted to smack her. Alex